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January 30, 2011



What a fabulous post - you are so right on every count - I am a big one for saying no to going out - I do it all the time - people may think me unsociable - I think so what - I'd rather be at home on the sofa watching Damages knowing that my two small boys are tucked up safe and sound upstairs and I'm there if they need me - also if I can throw in a bar of chocolate all the better !

What I have also learned is that it doesn't matter if you don't get invited to everything that is going on - it's nice to be asked but most often I'll say no anyway !!!


Listen more to your inner voice and be guided by it - it is right far more frequently than it is wrong.

You've come this far - celebrate that!


Totally agree! Thankyou for making me feel less of an antisocial freak! My teenage children are off and about partying and can't understand why their grumpy old mother doesnt want to do the same!
I remember the competitive 80's dinner parties and fussing all day on a Saturday to 'impress'...Nightmare! My new mug has the inscription 'Happiness is a cup of tea and a magazine' and you know, it truely is!
I also have finally grown into being able to enjoy tea in the National Trust without being ridiculed for being a fogey! Visiting such places were my guilty pleasure when I was younger, and I finally fit in - although I notice lots of younger people and families enjoying the buildings, artwork and cream teas now - perhaps I was too hard on myself!

Penny Dreadful Vintage

I love this post, so true on all counts. I must link back to it, should do a 'fabulous posts round-up' as I keep saving things like this which I love and want to share. I did something like this a while ago, though not as good as yours:



Golden nuggets of truth. You feel as if you are growing into your true character. It was always there, but now it's a stronger, more distilled version of your younger self. Less of it to go round, so used sparingly. Deeeep!


Lovely answers ladies, keep 'em coming (loved your post too PD!) Ax


Your work is not your life, your work "family" is not your real family, and you were looking for a job when you got this one.


After 50, it feels good to confidently sit in a cafe on your own/go for a walk on your own, and not fear that others may judge you a 'billy-no-mates'.


I was thinking the same thing the other day when walking the dog and avoiding bumping into I knew. Sometime its nicer to be on your own with your thoughts.

J x


Confidence has got to be one of the big advantages of getting older, hasn't it? Having the confidence to do so much more than when you were younger.
Ellen I LOVE your comment about work, that is SO true.
Any more? this is turing into a great list. Ax


Love your thoughts on the 'competitive' dinner party scenario...I have been part of this for a few years and its really not worth the stress! Have now taken a step back from this and its quite a relief. We also we have some show-off type 'friends' constantly telling us about how brilliant their children are and its really quite tiring. Realise now that its so much nicer to have a laugh at the pub, or maybe a takeaway with mates, but no pressure! Thanks for your post..it made me laugh and it rung so true. Hope you will be adding to it X


Great comment Emma, yes I think we'll keep adding to it and then send stressed out readers back to it regularly as a 'get a grip' check! Ax


here's to Tea - I remember in Vera Drake - when she said "Right then dear, first thing we've got to do is put the kettle on"

tea does make it all a little easier!

Pearl Westwood

What a wonderful post, especially about the nights out - same people, same place you arent missing anything! x

Christina Lindsay

Fantastic post! Very well said, thank you xx


I'm catching your post about a week after my 40th birthday. THANK YOU for the perspective!

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